Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Top 5 Character Traits of a True Friend

Lately, I've been thinking about my friends and the wonderful things about them that makes them so special. It all started one day when my daughter was crying telling me how her 'friend' hurt her. I sat and listened and thought I could totally do a preachy sermon right now, but I decided to let her do it. I simply asked her, "What are the things that make this person a special friend?" She tried to list some 'good' traits, but as she heard herself she realized they weren't so good. She began to realize on her own what it takes to make a dear friend, a true friend. It also got me thinking about my friends and what makes my friends more like sisters.

Here are my top five character traits I love to have in a true friend.

Number 1: They must know how to smile and laugh at a good joke. I have sincerely tried to make friends with just about anyone, but I have found the only ones that stay on the road of life with me are those that can heartily laugh. There is nothing better than getting together with a friend and laughing about life. You don't have to perform or have great jokes, it's about being joyous. Life is good and we have much to rejoice about and I'd much rather focus on the good than the bad.

"Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy. Then it was said among the nations, "The LORD has done great things for them." The LORD has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy." ( Psalm 126:2)

Number 2: You must love children. I love my children and I love my friend's children. If you want to be friends, remember I have six of them and they mean the world to me. Understand, I will not abandon them so we can go off somewhere and get a cup of coffee. My rule is this: coffee at my place or yours including all the noise and chaos-this is just how I roll.

It's simple, children are a blessing not a curse.

Courtney loves my kids like as if they were her 
own nieces and nephews.

I absolutely adore my very own nieces!

"Children are a heritage from the LORD, offspring a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them." 
(Psalm 127:3-4)

Number 3:    Be supportive, encouraging and excited to see the very best happen in your friend's life. We are not in a competition. A true friend isn't jealous or envious. A true friend is happy when you're happy and sad when you're sad and not the other way around. 

My friends came to hear me share my testimony

"One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." (Proverbs 18:24)

Number 4: You gotta be real. When we talk, tell me about you and what is happening in your life. I don't want to hear gossip. I want to learn about you.  Life is short and it can be hard, so let's do life together. I'm not afraid to share my crazy life with you, skeletons and all, so give it right back.

My friend and I couldn't stop talking 
while my son was trying to take a picture of us!
He finally had to say, "Hey guys! look THIS way!" 
After many tries...he got one!

"A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends." (Proverbs 16:28)

Number 5: Be loving. I'm tired of the sarcastic remarks that make me walk away guessing. Just be loving and if you don't love me, well, that's okay, just don't act like you do and drop confusing comments- I'm over it. Kindness is the order of the day.

Rebekah and I...there are no words for our friendship-it's just love!

"A friend loves at all times." Proverbs 17:17a

My buddy Kelly and I raised our babies together!

Marla and I raised each other!

An incredible Bible small group of women called, "Babes in Arms."
I bonded with these women so quickly. We shared openly, prayed unceasingly, and loved each other endlessly.

Like many of you, I've tried making friends and tried making old friendship last. There has been a lot of hurt and confusion along the way. And I know I have not been the sister I had hoped I would be to many friends and that has been sad too. I'm certainly not perfect in this, but I am striving to be a sister and have people in my life that will be a sister to me. 

I guess I naively thought that anyone could make a great friend, but truly there are only a few people that will be in that inner circle of trust so you must choose them wisely. "The righteous man chooses his friend carefully..." (Proverbs 12:26)  Think about what makes a friend a sister and not just a friend. A sister friend is someone who is going to lift you up and encourage you to grow. A sister friend will help you reach your God given talents, face fears, strive to be a better wife and mommy. A sister friend speaks into your life and helps tear down pride and selfishness. A sister friend teaches you and is open to being teachable. A sister friend is always praying for you. 

True sister friends are rare and when you find them,
 they are also such an incredible blessing! 

No comments:

Post a Comment